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Bing - Pow - What are you doing back here? I though I told you to go... Bing - Pow! PDF Print E-mail
( 0 Votes )
About - The Community
Written by Matthew J. DeReno   
Monday, 29 June 2009 11:58

You are with us now!  Nobody will F with you about movies any more. 

It is free to belong to CoolFilmz.com.  All you have to do is register and take the online blood oath of "omerta" and swear to uphold our secret society of movie mafia goons.  Once you are registered, you gain all sorts of extra privileges such as the following:

  • Ability to post, comment and submit articles.
  • Ability to create and post topics in our forums.
  • Access to exclusive CoolFilmz.com deals on merchandise and other related products.
  • Access to our newsletter.
  • Access to restricted content or content not yet made available to the general public.
  • Ability to chat with the owner or other writers that are online.  
  • And much, much more.
  • Ability to know more about movies than the next motherfucker. 

Thank you for being part of our family.  You are with us now.  Now, if you will excuse me, I would like to go to my daughter's wedding.

Sincerely,

-CFz Godfather

 

 
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The CFz Community is a place where you too can shoot the breeze about movies PDF Print E-mail
( 2 Votes )
About - The Community
Written by Matthew J. DeReno   
Tuesday, 12 August 2008 16:50

Our goal is to help you waste your life watching movies!  Okay,maybe that is an oversimplification.  We would like you to buy stuff here too so we can get rich off your slovenly lifestyle (Now that is honesty in advertising). 

Our mission is really to explore the modern day film as an extension of the, well, male extension. We will review most any film but we have a proclivity toward films featuring the stoic hero or the anti-hero, maybe even the wise cracking hero - the guy that should not be fucked with in a bar, the cowboy with the best shot, the explorer with the most germs, the space dude with the biggest laser cannon, and so on (Freud can go choke on a porno cigar!).

We endeavor to rate movies the manly way: by dishing out playing cards.  Yes, our system should be relatively easy to follow for the most IQ challenged Jack ass out there. 

A film gets an "ace" if it is super cool movie and a "joker" if the joke is on us.  In between, a film can get a "jack, queen or king."  We will eventually do the same for actors and directors but for now, we will focus on the overall work of the film itself.  

Our unique angle then is the "cool film" but more so than that, we will strive to explore what it is we like about cool films and what that says about us as a culture and maybe what we are doing while watching these films.  What exactly is our experience planting our butts in a arm chairs and over-sized sofas? How has that experience shaped our lives?  We know how it has shaped our asses. 

Even if this great cinematic experience is not for you, you can still be a part of it.  By registering you get the priveliege to tell us we are full of shit.  Plus, you can can mouth off about any movie you like.  If you are good, we might ask you to join our panel. 

Other than that, we are working on making CFz something special.  We aim to be the greatest movie review site this side of Plutos asshole.  We endeavor to stand at the top of the mountain with all the great movie review sites - if there is not any more room at the top of the mountain, we will know knock a few motherfuckers off the mountian.  That is how we roll and how we write at CFz!  

 
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Thinking Man's Buffoonery PDF Print E-mail
( 1 Vote )
About - The Community
Written by Matthew J. DeReno   
Saturday, 09 August 2008 16:46

CoolFilmz.com is more than just a movie review site.  It is a community of like-minded fools. A place where you can do many unproductive things:

  • Shoot the bull with your friends about movies
  • Comment on movie reviews
  • Discuss certain topics relating to film in our forums
  • Discover some old cool films collecting dust. 
  • Build a fan club in our user's lists relating to a particular movie, director, brand of popcorn, etc.
  • Relish the experience of mindless movies, good movies, movies that we spend far too much time watching when other problems should be demanding our attention. 
  • Explore how movies impact us and how people get impacted in movies - both with guns and kisses. 
  • Participate in the great American culture called Hollywood (Hey, sites like this are all part of that world on some level.  Hence you too are a part of it, when you participate at CoolFilmz. Okay.  This is a bit of stretch.  We also have a bridge to sell you in Brooklyn.  
  • Act so interested in one of our reviews that a co-worker foolishly believes you are working on that spreadsheet that is due later in the week, or better yet, the one that was due yesterday.   

However, this is not just a dude's site even though we are sure "The Dude" would be proud of this site.  Rest assured ladies, there is plenty of reasons to take a gander at CoolFilmz. If you know what we men like, you will know what to buy us besides a case of beer and a ticket to a ball game. 

Moreover, we are not so shallow to think a site called CoolFilmz will appeal mainly to men.  There are a lot of cool chicks out there whom we believe dig movies like we guys do!  So this is not a so-called "Gentleman's Club."  We make no pretensions about our proclivity for the action flick, cool movies that exude style, movies that have that certain thing... What the French call... Whatever the French call it.  You know what we are talking about.

On that note: Lights. Camera.  Click.

Matthew J. DeReno 

 
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